7th + 8th June 2011

Good day y'all
This fine day we shall go and find a wardrobe of delights, again. Vintage fashion heaven we be in. We can't tire ourselves out too much as we're headed over to Goodbye Blue Monday for The Brooklyn Tea Party, an open mic night we've been invited to, not to be confused with the right wing bastards that believe in racism homophobia and being generally republican fanatics.
The good folk Ina and Daniel have recommended we drape ourselves in the second hand cloth of Beacon's Closet. Ahh it's like Narnia. There's Aslan behind the counter looking so cool.
It's massive, organised chaos of every single outfit you can imagine. We have relieved the closet of:

• 1 tie dye maxi frock
• 1 blue fitted A-Line strapless number
• 1 cowboy's belt

 To wander!

The other day we happened upon The Candy Store, a great silk-screen poster shop. We return. The Melvins are having a signing. "Who are The Melvins?" Laura asks. Everyone seems VERY excited. Oh the Melvins! We buy many beautiful posters and leave. The posters we bought are all by Michael Michael Motorcycle http://www.michaelmichaelmotorcycle.com/ he was our favourite favourite, obviously. And we also congratulate ourselves in realising that they won't cost us anything in extra baggage coz it's just paper innit. Result.

We meander through the arty part of Williamsburg and see an array of interesting artists studios. We also find the best coffee in this area at Cafe Colette. We tell them so. We also find Bruar Falls - the sister venue to the Cake Shop.

After a quick strum and practice we're hot footing it to the J line, and on our way to Bushwick where we meet Ginger and Joel before our set. A bowl of chilli and a pint of Hoeegarden later we're amazed to see that an entire beer garden has been put in place since our last visit.  We find a ramshackle shed with as many strange artifacts as there are inside Goodbye Blue Monday and benches set out like pews with an aisle down the middle like a little church out in the Wild Wild West. We meet Joe Crow self styled 'Dude'. He's the preacher man along with his buddy . The first act we see is a woman playing auto-harp who you could mistake for a Coco Rosie.  Her 11 week old child is in the audience. Tapping her foot and clicking her fingers.

1, 2, skip a few it's little robots on next. "All the way from the best part of England.........."
We play our 2 numbers. We sing our socks off. We get rapturous applause and encore. No seriously, we really did! So we get asked for one more. Int that nice. Awww.

We WANT a J.
We get a J.
Good for us.
It's been too long :-)

This so called joint requires a saunter up Macy and past the projects home once to Jayzee. Our suspicions are confirmed. We have a pint on Macy and treat ourselves to a cab as it's late and dark and we don't know where we are.

Next day.
Mary leaves before Laura to achieve a goal of this holiday which is to buy a decent ukulele.
Laura leaves after Mary to achieve a goal of this holiday which is to go on a protest and march to satisfy her socialist tendencies.

Mary heads for West Village and Chelsea to 2 shops that have been recommended. Did they have ukuleles? Were they open ? NO! Bum. She did find Chelsea Poetry Club though. A strangely decorated club/cafe with such comedy names on the menu as dog shit stew. She passed.

Laura joins the march for HIV and AIDS treatment and prevention for all somewhere near the Chrysler building. She descends on the United Nations headquarters where there is a rally, a noisy exciting rally.
There was talks for all sorts of people from different corners of society including sex-workers, professors and campaigners all calling for fair treatment for patients and minority groups and funding for everyone.Right on!

We are united at the Empire State building, with Joel in tow. It's his last day and he has a passion for sky high views. It's AMAZING! being that high up and not feeling like you are about to fall off or anything. It's sooooo hiiigh up.  It was one of the best things we did on our trip and gave us an immense sense of the city and how it all maps out. From here we saw the Chrysler and the Flat Iron two buildings we particularly wanted to see on the trip and Madison Sq gardens, Central park, Hudson River,  etc etc to list but a few. We descend from the searing heat on floor 86 to the cooling marble foyer on Ground where Joel says his farewells. Bye Bye Joel. Nice meeting you lad. Now we need to find bathers for Nantucket.

1.5 hour later, 2 bathers bought. A hour queue promoting Mary to ask upon reaching the front how many people had died queuing that day. The reply, "we've all died a little today". So we head over to find the diner we've heard about in Williamsburg. We need to eat burger and chips in a diner. It's what we need to do in New York. It's what dreams are made of. We find it! Yes! Shiny steel clad 20's diner. We peek inside at thier art-deco steely decor and it's fucking shut innit. We knock and knock, please let us in, this is our dream. but no-one is home to hear our cries. A passerby says that it will be opening soon. How exciting. "What time?" "July 3rd".   We walk on to the fancy dinning car on the other side of the bridge. It's open, it's packed, it's fully booked, it's an hours wait for a burger and chips. *Cry*.

So, what shall we do? We walk with our heads hung low and our chins scraping the floor. Shall we go here? OK we say sadly to each other. But no need to be sad it's a Mexican cantina with a whole menu of Mezcal and tequila and cocktails - suppose this'll do.

• 1 prickly pear margarita 
• 1 hibiscus margarita
• 1 pork quesadilla with sweet potato
• 1 fish taco
• 2 large mescal with worm salt and an orange slice

Mary and Laura eat dry salty worms with their mescal. Umm, Crazy. Smuggled mescal, stowed by the owners who love it. They didn't seem like alcoholics. We seem like alcoholics though, by the time we leave. How giddy does mescal make us! We decide to put on our swim suits and dance on the roof.
True story. 

 




.

4th, 5th and 6th June 2011

All the days here are rapidly rolling into each other, even though each one still presents a new experience for us. We still have so much to see do and see.

Here's a few of the highlights of the last 3 days:

• Laura wants to be individually snap happy. We hop over to 23rd + 6th to Best Buys and get a Nikon digital camera. 
• We're really getting on with Ginger (or as we like to call her 'Gorgeous') so we all meet in Hell's Kitchen for a bite to eat. Ginger points out a naked man just over yonder.
• Finally we've gone to Central Park. Our little busking session raises $15. People are so friendly. It's been a fun busk .
• On Ina and  Daniel's lat night we have dinner at the Rabbit Hole. We have a right good chin wag about Daniel's work and music videos we like and where we've been in our trips in New York. Laura's ethics go a bit squiffy and she orders grilled Fois Gras to start. Oh it is so nice! Next we head over to PT Bar to meet Ginger. She says it's the first time she's been out with all her guests at once. Awwwwww innit nice :-). After beer, cocktails and wine, a fine array if mixed beverages good enough for any terrible hangover, we go to the Lucky Dog. We play Shuffleboard and drink, Scotch. Straight up . 
• Harlem with Ginger to see her apartment and meet Joel her new tenant. He's a tour manager who's in NY for a writing session with some members from his band. We see the beautiful Brownstones of Harlem and imagine Big Bird walking down the street and Oscar hiding in the trash cans. The Black United Front Fund Plaza AKA the Shrine and adjoining French cafe. Mary consumes 2 Bloody Mary's before 1pm. Well done that woman. We get invited to Miriam and Amadou's after party at the Shrine. How exciting! We like all the reggae and juice bars dotted about Harlem. What a great concept. 
• We meet Lou Reid in the flesh, a jazz trumpeter who plays at the shrine every Sunday with his band the All-stars. We exchange cds. 
• On the street, just walking down to the Village Underground and after the initial shock of hearing an English accent we get chatting to James. He's in town performing his 2 man rap show about evolution which he brought over from Edinburgh Fringe Festival. He's a lovely fellow from London.  Hopefully we'll be going to see the Highline with him to have a few jars. 
• The Village Underground is a highly recommended venue to see RnB and gospel singers take the open mic with backing from the most amazing pro session musicians. Hot Damn! Those guys are good, and tight and blow us away. Mr Grant and Kim the lead singer from Chic are the hosts and backing singers! We leave around 2am busk on the subway.  
• Thanks for your jokes Brooklyn Boy
•  The Plaza Hotel Food Hall. Too posh! A pistachio macaroon is all we can afford. Mary dopes a bt of window shopping at the Milliners and tries on the most amazing huge hat with stuff blackbirds and peacock feathers on it.  No photos allowed unfortunately. 
• Ai Wei Wei - the Chinese horoscope sculptures. We are really lucky to catch this street exhibition whilst we are in NY.
• It was the Israeli Day Parade earlier but we see 6 trucks with big anti-Zionist banners on the side. The trucks were driven by orthodox Jews. 
• MoMA - the Museum of Modern Art. Picasso's guitar exhibition, Hungarian revolutionary posters, I am still alive exhibition, the contemporary art collection. Vast impressive place.  We enjoyed it plenty.
• Macy's - Laura buys another dress and another lipstick. Mary buys MORE shoes. We're on the 5th pair now. Oops.We play dress up in the prom dress department and put on loads of make-up at the MAC counter before leaving to meet Stewart.
• We think of our good friend AMOS and meet her good friend Stewart at his swish 6th Av NY apartment. It's like we've stepped into our TV sets. he takes us to an amazing restaurant called ABC Kitchen. We eat at the bar:

                        2 Old fashioned cherry sours
                        1 Gibson with onions
                        1 Ginger margarita
                        1 Citrus thyme lemonade
                        1 Oven roasted wood fiddle head fern
                        1 Snap pea and Parmesan salad
                        1 Crab and lemon aoili on toast
                        1 Wholewheat tomato mozzarella and basil pizza
                        1 Suckling pig garlic creamed potatoes tomato marmalade,
                           scallions and asparagus
                        1 doughnuts with bacon chocolate fudge sauce
          Did we tell you how amazing it was? It was amazing........

• Stewart has invited us to Nantucket for the weekend. We need to buy bathers. All our plans for this weekend are out the window. Fuckit, we're going to Nantucket.
• We meet Joel at Union Square for late night drinks. Lots of talk about the music industry. he doesn't like our music :-) but he appreciates out 'talents'. 

3rd June 2011

A leisurely rise at 1pm. Congratulations Booth you managed to sleep past 6am.
To Garage Internet via the best pork burrito in town *dribble*
We wash it down with

• 1 Acai power juice
• 1 Berry smoothie

Looking cool with the kids on the sidewalk. Passers-by drool with jealousy.

Blog written. Happy to find out that folk are actually reading these words. :-) Thanking you.

On the back of a Luke Owen Smith recommendation. Laura is eager to catch Aloe Blacc tonight at the Highline Ballroom.   Through a mist of confusion we manage to by the one and only ticket left for sale. 
No more. None. Gone gone gone. Jumping like a catfish on a pole.
What we gonna do? Mary suggests that due to Laura's arduous desires for Aloe Blacc she should take the ticket. Mary you little sacrificial lamb you. Mary hearts Laura.

Then..........

We pick the ticket up at Times Square. :-O Blooming 'ec!
We rise from the subway. Oh my! Laura is aghast. Like a rabbit in the headlights. Times Square is weird.
The biggest brightest lights she's ever seen. A big massive church to consumerism. If we were capitalists this is where we'd come to pray. Every sign has to compete to be the bestest and the flashiest or you just won't notice it amongst the rest. Even the subway sign winks at us like it's for a Las Vegas casino.

We enter an office block, the entrance clad in black marble. Cool black marble. It feels posh. It has air-con. We ascend 14 stories clicking our fingers to the elevator choons. We collect the ticket after copying Mary's passport and cloning her identity right down to the burrito smudge on her top lip.

We make our way down a couple of blocks to Port Authority subway. Ah! FDNY! They love it! Hey look, yeah, I'm in a big truck, I'm fit, I'm heroic. Holla me! Holla me! Stroke my uniform. You wanna know how many fires I've extinguished today !! Yes we do! Yes we do!
Though this somewhat puts us off from taking the subway. Why are there 5 fire engines? Smoky!
Let's take a cab to the Highline Ballroom. Through the amazing Manhattan streets and Avenues even just catching a cab is an event.

Hopefuly we'll get a ticket for Mary Booth on the door. Outside the Mayor's Office.....
"please move off the sidewalk miss, you'r outside the mayor's office"
"errr, can you tell us if there are any ticket touts around here?"
"You can queue and see if they have any tickets for tonight's event here" *points*. "The tickets are released from 9.30 pm but really you should talk to that guy over there. I don't really know. I'm just making it up lovely ladies. Oooo I'm being paged. Excuse me i gotta go and wipe the Mayor's ass. Have fun".
"You too"

Before we even reach the back of the ticket queue a cute bespectacled guy asks "are you girls waiting for tickets?" "yes!" "Then let me sell you one" "Why couldn't your girlfriend make it? :-)"
Awesome $15 and it's ours. Huzzah. Booth and Acaster remain united.

"Excuse me ladies will you be drinking tonight?"
"Do you sell rum?"
"Yes we do ma'am"
"Yes then yes we are" 
How we've struggled to get our lips on a rum and coke.

We stand at the front 3 rows back. Great soul tunes playing. The light dims. Whooping from the crowd, the band enter stage left. They are so young. How did they get this gig? Did Jim fix it for em?

Aloe Blacc *wave* how are you today? Trilby, tight jeans and waitcoat. He's definitely looking at Laura when he comes singing this side of the stage.Tru dat tru dat. The most memorable songs of the gig were certainly Politician and Dollar.

• 6 rum and cokes

A quick game of paper scissor stone. The prize a trilby off of Curtis's head. Laura won and Curtis bought it back for $10. A quick dance before heading out the door.

"I know you....Ah! You're Aloe Blacc. Nice to meet you. I'm Laura and this is Mary"

As Laura buys Aloe's CD and asks him to sign it and draw a mustache on his face on the cd sleeve, a roady's about to mow Mary down.
"mind out darling" says Aloe and slips an arm around Mary's waist.
"ohhhhh, please draw a mustache on your face Aloe"
"no! How about love and smiles. That sound nice?"
....Oh no here comes the roady again! Aloe pulls Mary close. Mary, "can you go and get your fit guitarist to sign it too?" Aloe, " um I don't know where my guitarists at", he says pulling her closer as the roady nearly mows her down for the third time.

HONK! HONK!
A garbage truck has stopped outside the Highline
"hey mister can I have a go on your horn?"
"yeah sure!"
"can I get in your cab?"
"yeah go ahead"
"cool! Can I get in your cab and honk your horn?"
"hop in girl"
Another NY dream has come true for Laura. It was great!

Balls. They've shut the L line home for the weekend already.
We split the cab fare home with the cool Eugenie.
We hope it works out with you and your nearly new bloke.

2nd June 2011

Ha ha ha we've had a lie in!
Mary and Laura rise at 10am :-) it might have something to do with the 5 pint nightcap.

We climb the stairs of the apartment building to the roof where we get magnificent 360 degree views of Brooklyn. We can see right over to the skyscraper horizon of Manhattan. Little white birds flock together in the breeze and look beautiful as they flit between the high rises.

We feel the first cool wind of the holiday and decide to stay up on the roof to write our blog installment. It's a sunny day and everything feels A OK. We won't be doing much today to save ourselves and our energy for tonight's gig.

A bit of window shopping on Bedford Avenue before lunch at Fabien's. Mary gets accosted by a dog. She loves it. He insistantly leaps into her lap knocking Laura's coffee all over the bloody shop. Laura doesn't love it. Mary squeals in glee. Oh so happy is she.

• 1 roast chicken gluten free toastie
• 1 roast pork, cranberry and pickle toastie. Hold the fucking cheese. 
• 1 luke warm coffee

Delicious.

Oh, my shoulder hurts. Oooo mine too. Feel the heat rise through my jeans Laura. Mary, you're bright red! Laura, you are too! Ooo it hurts. I think we are severely sun burnt :-( It feels like we are 10 year old kids on school sports day. 

Eyebrows seem to be today's obsesison. So we play our new game: Preened or Wild. We have to promtly stop this nonesense as we are making people feel uncomfortable. Sorry.

Independent bookshop on Bedford. Oh look there's a cat. Oh look there's a Booth. Booth and Hawes the bookstore cat fall in love. Strewned across the Philosophy section. Booth and Hawes are happy. Puurrrrr.

• 14 postcards
• 2 books: Leonard Cohen, selected poems 1956 - 1968. J D Salinger, 9 stories. 

Mary can't see any books for being too distracted.

Aloe Vera *wave*. How are you today? Please liberally apply your soothing, cooling, gooey, green, sticky self over my red bits. Oooo you are so lovely and make me feel better.

Band practice. We sound shit .....hot. We's gonna totally rock it man. Rocket Man!

Goodbye Blue Monday. Tohm is the first act with her strange mix of bubble-gum pop, frilly titilation and gender stereotypes. Mary and Laura squirm in their seats.

• 1 burritto
• 1 beans and rice

Showtime!

Already heckled. They love us cos we got funny accents and they try to make us say things we don't want to say. We take it in our stride with a smile, cos we is well cool. We can give as good as we get, and we do, and they laugh and they quieten down.

We had a few familiar faces in the crowd. Our 2 flat mates form Berlin; Ina and Daniel. Ina has taken some photos which we shall upload imminently. Rebecca Pronsky and Richard Bennet are there whom Mary befriended whilst they were on tour in England. Rebecca is a great singer songwriter. Check her out - http://www.rebeccapronsky.com. We're looking forward to seeing Rich play at Vaudeville Park Bushwick Avenue next Friday 10th June.

The kids have done good. We're happy with the way we played and presented ourselves. If you fancy watching the gig you can see us on the Goodbye Blue Monday site - http://www.goodbye-blue-monday.com.

Towards the end of Brother Fox, our last song, we recieve a large chamber pot full of money! The lovely bar tender did a whip round for us. We got $34 and a nut and bolt. Thank you kind people. The rehearsals have paid off. The gig went well. Little Robots have played New York!!!! ALRIGHT!

Next up Baby Baby. Thank god we were on before them. Nudity features heavily in their set and with that amount of flesh on show and noise made it would have been a hard act to follow. They were so entertaining and energetic. They are silly :-) Punk/funk/garage/grunge.

We met a Scottish woman called Charlotte. We love her. Laura felt great cos she could talk in her beloved Sheffield twang without having to talk really slowly and without repetition.

People We Like Who We Have Also Met

• Steve the bar owner ( don't worry we won't sue you for the bench collapsing under us)
• the Frenchman whose name begins with the letter G we think
• the Baby Baby boys (the percussionist enjoyed his trip to York)
• the pretty guy whose wife is from Kent
• Vanessa and Matthew who told us to check out the Village Underground and the Rose Bar
• Jhoan a nice mountain biker who mended our wobbly table with Tohm flyers

10 pints of Yuengling larger

Out of tonight's earnings we treat ourselves to a cab home. We've had a great night out.
Bushwick we'll be back.



 

1 st June 2011

Our bodies are adjusting to the time but not the heat. Laura almost permanently needs the air-conditioning on now. She lies scantily clad under a cotton sheet beside Mary who's cocooned in the duvet with icicles hanging from her nose. One face is pink. One face is blue. Never mind, ahhh a cool nights sleep was had.

In the morning Laura has a little taste of home, in the cold, all snuggly under the duvet. As soon as Mary sees her though she cries, "What yer doin' wi't air-con and't duvet on?! Yer wastin' energy y'know", and she turns the air-con off leaving Laura to sweat like she's in a stuffy apartment in a heat-wave under 5 togs of polyester.

Off to write the blog at Garage Internet. It's part of a series of shops like the Forum in Sheffield and feels how the Forum used to feel in the olden days.

Next we head over to try and find The Statue of Liberty. We get to a museum at Battery Park. A quick scan, search and frisk by the door security. We wee and leave.
HOT DOG off of a street vender.
Wham bam in yer hand. Eight inches of salty goodness, with onions, ketchup and mustard.
A tsunami of tourists devastate Battery Park.
We make our way through unharmed.

"I can see the sea and the sea can see me. We can see the Statue of Liberty"

We decide not to look around the park because in the ferry terminal for Staten Island there must be at least 9 air-conditioners bathing Laura in sweet sweet cold cold air air.

The huge free ferry takes us past Ms. Liberty standing proud in all her glory. We see a misty shoreline of skyscrapers, it's amazing. Cargo ships, tug boats, yachts, sewage works. We go from the swish city to a poorer industrial Staten Island.

We have a saunter from the ferry terminal along the coastline to the interior. It feels like walking through a desert on the sidewalk. The path stretches out forever. No hope of ever finding life again. We have drunk our last drop of water. We'd like to dip our feet in the sea and have a paddle but Mary points out the sewage plant the size of 8 football pitches just over yonder. It takes sewage works the size of Staten Island to deal with all the shit in this city.All that is left is to find the sweet sweet cold cold air air conditioned ferry terminal and go back to Manhattan.

Conscious of our looming gig we decide to have a practice on the ferry on our way back and serenade Ms. Liberty with Bombs, she likes a good anti-war song. Folk are tapping their feet. One woman gets up and leaves, her hearing aid is obviously faulty. As we dock the suited city worker tells us he had the best seat on the ferry today and asks us if we had a CD. Says he's gonna come to the gig. We'll see. We tell him where the gig is, "What Broadway, Brooklyn?! You'll be playing Broadway, Manhattan next year"

We catch the subway to City Hall. We don't need no piece of paper from the City Hall we're just trying to get to Chinatown. There's a protest gathering. They're demonstrating against the cuts in the social budget and withdrawal of monies for social infrastructure by corporations.
We visit a restroom later on, in Starbucks. It was as filthy as the hands of this big corporation. Job done. We leave.

We meet a nice man and discuss the US and UK social policies and disgusting cuts to the welfare stare. They target the poor first, cut their standards of living whilst the multi-million pound corporations get richer. Whilst the rich get richer the poor get poorer. The nice man tells us about an upcoming protest regarding the HIV and AIDS policies. Hopefully we'll see him there.

We eat steamed broccoli, chicken and brown rice. We'll find a better Chinese restaurant next time. We go for a coffee at the Chinese bakery next door. Laura's South Yorkshire parlance proves foxing. After talking e-v-e-r-s-o-s-l-o-w-l-y and repeating and repeating we finally get not what we asked for.

We busk outside the criminal court to a half dead rat, squirrels, and a fella on the next bench until we're rudely interrupted by the insistent Victor from Cambodia/France (both places). He want s to practice his English on us. Why us?! He sets off on the wrong foot asking if Laura is Mary's daughter. We smile and say yes. Mary had her when she was only 7 years old. It's been a hard life.

"Do you MSN? Do you Skype? Can we chat? Can I have your phone number? I leave in 4 days. Can you come to France to visit me?"
"Err NO, sorry Victor."

We are witness to the to-ings and fro-ings of the Criminal Court. It doesn't feel good. 11 story windowless detention centre, police cars, correction centre buses, cops in uniform, cops in plain clothes but we only see one prisoner escorted in handcuffs into the main entrance. We see bail bond shops galore. It's an unfamiliar world.

Right, let's go and find Goodbye Blue Monday and steady the nerves for the gig. We successfully find the street but of course, we head in the opposite direction of said venue. About turn. We walk past the cool Bushwick city farm for the second time. A volunteer led project, so the good folk of Bushwick can stroke bunnies and pet chickens under the train track. Wooo Wooo. 

So were here, obviously here, because there's a ring master with a top hat welcoming the good folk. Through he doorway we're hit with soaring temperatures, aluminium gorillas, 50's TV sets, umbrella lanterns and good Belgium beer. We like this place. We hear some good and some bad music. It Rains In My Face and a Pittsburgh trio that had a too intelligent a name for us to remember, something about a belt of stuff around the globe that protects us from things.  They are our favourites.

Very drunk and tired. Tried to get on a subway the wrong way. We go the right then head for home on foot the wrong way. Laura's instincts are strong. She should use deodorant. Whatever they say we'll do the opposite from now on.

Games We Have Played Today

• Hat or wig
• Stick or alligator

31st May 2011

Mary gets up at 7.30 am. Feeds, drinks, showers.
Leaves to avoid argument number 2 and let's Laura sleep and
then casually prepare for the day.
Mary returns after skip diving. A board is found to make a placard for the potential Brother Fox music video to be filmed on the 'Earth-Cam' at Times Square. Well done Booth! 

Buffalo Vintage Exchange Expedition. Booth buys a nice hat which now seems permanently glued to her head. Laura buys pretty dress number 3. To make a bit of money we're thinking of taking some of our UK clothes to Buffalo Exchange to make some spare dough. It's a great idea for clothes shop and a great shop.

Time to get lost. Our first subway experience. Ooooo - it's air conditioned. Oh My! It's clean. Take note London. We navigate successfully from Driggs Ave to Union Sq where we come across our first social activists; Hey Albany, transit isn't your money train! Check out their website. Www.riderrebellion.org. "Stop the price hike".

Right, to consume in Union Sq:

• jeans ( no importation required thanks mummy Booth)
• flip-flops
• iced latte 
• blackberry charger
• i-pod charger
• whoopie pie
• camera (unsuccessful)

We dine on homemade chicken salad in Union Sq with a homeless dude,. a spoilt woman, a quiet couple, 2 skaters and a thrusting bmx'er.

Mary keeps getting hot fella's smiling at her. Here comes number 3.

Right! To the Highline, waint, no turn aorund, straight on, left at 5th, are you sure? Yes. Onto West W 14th St, Ooooo Chelsea Hotel is 7 blocks away. Let's go! This road isn't supposed ot be here. Are you sure? No. Ok, let's keep going. Shit. We're lost!

We've walked past Chelsea, Greenwich and encroached onto Soho. What a mission on a gammy foot.
Let's plan out day better next time.

We've noticed each area of  New York have their own very distinctive feel, even neighbouring districts.
We end up on McDougal St and dine at the Olive Tree.
Event of the century. We ask for a Bud each and the waitress ask if she can see our ID.
Laura " how old are you Mary? nearly 35?"
Mary "mmm mmmm" 
ALRIGHT!

The Olive Tree is so-so. Meh. Not bad. We leave.

The Big Black Pussy Cat. Apparently the best open mike in the world.  With gospel, rnb and funk acts, and according the the doorman it's great.
Mary look up. What? Look up! Ooooooo!
Blue Note Jazz Club, photo opportunity and the only touristy thing we've seen today. $35 for entertianment. $20 to use the bar, but we're going to see the free Blue Note music event for thier 30th Anniversary in Central Park on the 11th June. Can't wait.

Back around.4 Rum and cokes at Stanes Ale House. Errrrr Mary Booth, are those Geordy accents?  Ah yes. Mmmmm. They sound nice.  

Laura says she wouldn't livein Greenwhcih. That she prefers Willimasburg. Mary says she could if she met a rich man.

Do the prices keep going up in this bar the longer we stay? Are they inadvertantly asking us to leave?

Smile number 4. Guitar toting bowler :-)

We see military boys and girls promenading the streets in their sailor suits. No lack of attention from the local girls. All the nice girls love a sailor.

A saunter to the subway. It feels ghetto. Boys shooting b-ball outside the school.

So, we catch the wrong subway train. We chanced a connection. We knew we'd catch the right train at Union Sq but, no,  we took a chance, took a chance, took a chance chance and messed up.The subways often make no sense.

We've mastered London and Barcelona undergounds but New York remains illusive.

Lucky Dog. A bar on Bedford. It's the Rabbit Hole's second favorite after themselves. It's cool. It's hip. It's moody. It's got a nice beer garden. All important beer garden.  Fizzy golden ale for our fizzy golden souls. Ahhhhhhh.

We're in search of some new souls to meet but the Luck Dog isn't  lucky for us.  Too salty. So Mary keeps calling it the Salty Dog. Ho Ho.

Quotes of the Day

"We even sell none physical spectacles. You don't even know you're wearing em"
"What's up Doc?"
"A boy bouncing 3 basketballs"
 "does bum mean fanny like fanny means bum? Because I called someone a bum head earlier and they might have thought I meant fanny head "

30th May 2011

Mary up at 6am
Laura up at 10am
Fruit salad. Sussed out the washing machine. Found the iron.

First argument. Can't remember the details but it was about getting out the house. Minor trivialities.

We leave the house! Walk half a block. CRATER IN THE ROAD SWALLOWS MARY!!!!
Mary can't walk, it's not just the blisters but a kind lady asks Mary if she wants a bandaid :-)

Mary really actually can't walk!
Laura considers dropping her off at the retirement center so she can get a bit of respite. We hobble to the pharmacy. The consultants says she needs her feet up for 24 hours and to put her foot on ice. So we promptly head to a beer garden and experience our first Bloody Mary, which seems to be the Williamsburg drink of choice.

• 2 White Russians
• 2 Pints of beers  
• 2 Bloody Mary's
• 1 Watermelon and feta salad
• 1 Quinoa and wild rice salad

And here we are thinking about going to the cinema.

The waiter reminds us a less good looking Pete David, but we haven't heard him sing or play the guitar. 
He's probably better :-)

We hope Mary's fucking feet get better.
Laura considers chopping them off.

Pete David refuses to put Mary's cold compress into the freezer. Pete David is bad. 

Let's have a fag and hobble home.

By the way it's soooooooo fucking hot.
We're sat in the shade.

Mary's now spent the afternoon in bed with elevated foot, feeling sorry for herself. Thank god we brought the box of Brother Fox cds. It proves a good foot rest. They's good for something. 
Laura fucks off.

She posts the first story on the blog, gets dinner and come back to Mary sad in the face. THE PAUL SIMON GIG HAS SOLD OUT! OH DEAR.
We now feel really sorry for oursleves.
Not really - we're in New York.

We head out for some pain free fun, we thought, Pirates of the Caribbean in Downtown Brooklyn- excellante.
but......ouch! Are the American's deaf? Everything comes in supersize, including cinematic volume. We think they turned it up to 11.

Downtown Brooklyn is very different to Williamsburg. Huge buildings, government offices. It feels a little bit intimidating, but then it is 1 o'clock at night.

The film is ace.
 

29th May 2011

Woke up at 6am. It's a bit late for Laura and early for Booth. Tea and bagel in bed.
Out the house before 8am. Woah.

Williamsburg is great. Everything funnily feels so American. It's like we're in America.
Explored immediate area. Quiet in the morning. Bought groceries. Expensive groceries. Ate eggs and drank coffee at the Rabbit Hole. Couldn't think of a better local. Good: garden, menu, prices, atmosphere.

Bed time! Nana nap.
Every one on Bedford Avenue is SO NOISY.
"that's totally amazing"
"I didn't hit you", "yes you did"
"PARP PARP"

Head out across Williamsburg bridge. From here you can see Manhatten and Brooklyn bridges, the Manhatten skyline and we caught our first sign of Ms Liberty.
The traffic zooms by, the subways go chuff a bit slower down the line. We talk about the Brooklyn sea-monster which we've decided to write a song about. Lo6ts of graffiti saying R.I.P to friends who have jumped. :-(   A beautiful portrait dribbled in tar on the walkway.

We're walking form the relative quiet to the chaos in search of Katz's Deli.
"Where you at Bitch"
  Ha ha ha, we're in NY!!!!

Right onto Essex, left onto Housten. KATZ'S DELI. Laura's heart pounds for a famous pastrami sarni and the best pickles known to man.
We love food.
Let's feed our figures.

we have to share one portion between us. the most delicious, succulent pastrami in the world. Homemade coleslaw. Steak fries and pickles with a can of Pepsi. Dreams have come true today.
NYPD! Our smiley waiter is commandeered by the cops. It's not him they're looking for.
Souvenirs bought.

Oh look! Someone in a CSI cap!

Booth's feet are killing her. If we walk home tonight, she needs a new pair of shoes. So there she goes and buys some clogs. Ah! The give her blisters too! Oh Mary! Right, to buy another pair of shoes.
Today's budget is blown.
The new trainers give her blisters too but she makes it home.
Mary examines her feet. Blisters galore. All over!  What are we going to do in this walking city. Walk on our hands?

A drink before bedtime in our favorite watering hole.

Nearly everyone in Williamsburg has to have at least one tattoo, wear a Trilby and walk an accessory dog.
 

Earlier in the Day

• a Brummy accent hollers 'Happy Hour 5 - 7 girls"
• we see our first street drinker; beer in a paper bag
• cool vintage clothing shop
• we must have funny accents - Mary, " these are our hats". Man in shop, "you wanna use the changing room?". Laura, "tips please".Sales clerk, "tape? You want tape?". Laura, "No filter tips". Sales clerk, "tape?".   

28th May 2011

Laura awakes with a Booth grin in her face.

Porridge, foot, tube, train,bus, foot, fag.

Casually smoked a fag because we're 'early'. WRONG TERMINAL.
FUCKIN' RUNNING!!!

Foot, bus, foot, travelator.

TOO LATE FOR CHECK IN :-(

Nearly cried. Nearly sick. Urgh.

Check in for free on later flight. Thank you kind Stephanie :-)

Mingin' salad for Mary. Reliable gammon for Laura. No steak knives allowed. Worried about terrorists eating each other for dinner.

To smoke a fag!

The moral of the story:
Mary can be wrong sometimes and Laura should ALWAYS double check Mary's 'facts'.

"Well Mary, it reminds you that you're only human doesn't it"

Big thanks to all the really lovely people who have helped us thus far. xxx

What You Can Get With A Smile

•  minimum cost reduced on Oyster Card
• smiles and information from the electric blue eyed lady
• directions from Delta air greeter
• help with our suitcase from the man with the wandering eye
• letting the bus leave early - bus steward, bus driver and supervisor (the suit)
• reassurance from passenger number 1 and smiley Japanese man
• comfort "No need to cry, you have options. Look at my beautiful tan, stroke my quiff"

Watched His and Hers on the plane. A documentary. We cried.
 Women are wonderful.


Grumpy James answered all our mundane questions. Thanks mate.


Laura watched True Grit
Mary watched Get Low.
We heart Bill Murray and Jeff Bridges.


Perfect toilet within sneaking distance of us to join the mile high club. Let's talk no more about that.


Poor little dude in front of us sick ALL the way to America.


Mary couldn't take healthy substances into America, including seeds and nuts due to America's paranoia. She also had to declare her recent cow petting incident as they needed to know if one had been near livestock recently.


We alighted the plane and queued for HOURS. Herded like cattle so they could take our finger prints ( they even took children's) and photographs. First they let Laura through, then Mary. Smiles can get you anywhere, even past customs/boarder immigration control.


BAGS, FAGS, CAB!
FIRST YELLOW CAB!


Everyone smiles so far in America :-)


Nigerian taxi driver, he won't be buying a Nissan.
He still views NY as a gun-toting-drug-taking city like it was in 1988.
He won't take the subway and tells us to stay away from drugs.


We drag 34Kg 5 flights to Apartment 21. It looks just like it does on Air B+B.
Met our host Ginger. She lays down the house rules.
No hard liquor, shoes off, no lock on the bathroom door. We have the master bedroom with plier controlled air-con.
I'ts hot.


Bedtime. It's only 10 pm but it feels like 4am.
Comfiest bed in the world. Mary Booth is very happy.


GUN SHOT!!!!
OH MY GOD WE'RE IN NEW YORK.

WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO
SLEEP.
 

27th May 2011

Before bedtime ..........

• 1 Large Brandy
• 1 Large Whisky

Thanks to Nellie, Neil and Liam for your excellent company, delicious meal and comfy spare room.
Viva la socialist republic of South Yorkshire!

Little Robots bite the Big Apple

Hello one and all.
Welcome to Little Robots new blog. We thought some of you might be vaguely interested in our adventures so read on if you are.
Mary and Laura are currently in New York awaiting a gig on Thursday at Goodbye Blue Monday, 1087 Broadway. Where we shall sing Little Robot standards and a few new ones.
We're so excited to be in New York after saving up nuff dollar for the pleasure!
We'll be keeping a journal of our time here and updating this blog as and when we get the chance but for now, this is it.
See ya x x x